Noise Meter by AGeekMom
Whenever I am looking for apartments, I frequently ask the landlord questions he or she may not usually receive: “Can you hear the sound of traffic? How thick are the walls? Can you hear people walking above? Are the pipes iron-cased? Can you hear the sound of running water? I don’t want to know if anyone’s going the bathroom. Will I hear peeing?”
The landlord stares at me like I’m an idiot (which is accurate). He immediately rips up the application and tells me the place has just been rented by a ghost. I accept this and go see another one.
The point is that I am very sensitive to sound. I am often told I should go live in the country, but this presumes the country is within a deep silence. What about the crickets and the tractors? How thick are these walls?? If there is anyone out there who suffers this form of sensitivity, I hope to give you a little primer on what you’ll encounter in certain neighborhoods in Seattle, starting today with the U-district.
I-5 by Ewan-M
If you are looking at apartments anywhere between 9th and Latona, you are going to hear the I-5; you are going to hear it morning and night, when there is little traffic, and when it’s rush hour. Sometimes it will sound like an angry ocean, and sometimes it will just sound like a highway, but it will become part of your life. Some people try to equate it to “white noise,” but that is just a desperate rationalization. To deal with it then, I suggest the following: Buy a car so you feel like part of the problem. Keep a fan running at all times, and occasionally it will trick you into thinking it’s making all that noise. Blast techno music; it will make the cars look they are in a chase scene (which is exciting!).
If you reside between University Way and 21st street (above 45th) in the U-District, you will frequently hear drunken college students stumbling about. To avoid irritation, it is important to pretend you are part of the fun. I suggest yelling out your window at random, “You did not just say that! This guy, I swear!” Now you’re at the party, and not being annoyed by it. Problem solved.
Do you hear construction from the giant crane on 12th? Become a construction worker. Bothered by the club music on University Way? Buy a glow stick. There’s a crazy panhandler yelling outside your window? Play a Tom Waits album. Did a drunk girl just scream even though she is in no danger? Yell at her. Is the constant smell of buffalo wings north on Roosevelt driving you crazy? That’s not a sound, it’s a smell, have you been paying attention at all? Buy cinnamon incense.
I hope this FDA approved guide has been helpful. Do you have a unique sound that’s driving you crazy? Let us know, unless it’s in your head. Then please do not write.
The Sounds of the U-district (and how to deal with them)
Noise Meter by AGeekMom
Whenever I am looking for apartments, I frequently ask the landlord questions he or she may not usually receive: “Can you hear the sound of traffic? How thick are the walls? Can you hear people walking above? Are the pipes iron-cased? Can you hear the sound of running water? I don’t want to know if anyone’s going the bathroom. Will I hear peeing?”
The landlord stares at me like I’m an idiot (which is accurate). He immediately rips up the application and tells me the place has just been rented by a ghost. I accept this and go see another one.
The point is that I am very sensitive to sound. I am often told I should go live in the country, but this presumes the country is within a deep silence. What about the crickets and the tractors? How thick are these walls?? If there is anyone out there who suffers this form of sensitivity, I hope to give you a little primer on what you’ll encounter in certain neighborhoods in Seattle, starting today with the U-district.
I-5 by Ewan-M
If you are looking at apartments anywhere between 9th and Latona, you are going to hear the I-5; you are going to hear it morning and night, when there is little traffic, and when it’s rush hour. Sometimes it will sound like an angry ocean, and sometimes it will just sound like a highway, but it will become part of your life. Some people try to equate it to “white noise,” but that is just a desperate rationalization. To deal with it then, I suggest the following: Buy a car so you feel like part of the problem. Keep a fan running at all times, and occasionally it will trick you into thinking it’s making all that noise. Blast techno music; it will make the cars look they are in a chase scene (which is exciting!).
If you reside between University Way and 21st street (above 45th) in the U-District, you will frequently hear drunken college students stumbling about. To avoid irritation, it is important to pretend you are part of the fun. I suggest yelling out your window at random, “You did not just say that! This guy, I swear!” Now you’re at the party, and not being annoyed by it. Problem solved.
I hope this FDA approved guide has been helpful. Do you have a unique sound that’s driving you crazy? Let us know, unless it’s in your head. Then please do not write.